How do I Know What is Enough?

Another issue I hear about frequently is how do I know what is enough, and whether feeling the need to do too much is self-imposed or is the actual expectation. This is difficult to answer and of course it depends on your context. Unfortunately, the expectation to always be available and always do more has only increased since we started carrying phones that give us the option to stay connected and be available all the time. We can also carry old messages of not feeling like enough or needing to do extra to prove our worth. 

Some questions that can be helpful to ask yourself are: 

Am I making a meaningful contribution that is aligned with my values? 

Am I completing the tasks that were assigned to me? A follow up to this can be to question if the workload is reasonable. This can be difficult to discern and it can be difficult to advocate for ourselves if the workload is truly too much. 

Where is this feeling of not doing enough actually coming from? Is it my voice? Is it coming from someone in my current environment? Or am I reacting to messages and expectations from the past?

Start with these questions and see what arises for you. Self-compassion and appropriate boundary setting can be helpful as you start to tune into your experience more. 

Stay tuned to the Being Enough blog for more ideas on how to better understand what enough really looks like for you. In the meantime, remember to tell yourself that you really are already enough (even if you don’t believe it yet).

Jennifer Miesch, Ph.D.